It's OK for adults to curse. Really

I was expecting the worst when I read an article last week that said Bud Keene, coach to snowboarder and Olympic gold-medal winner Shaun White, "made several vulgar and expletive comments to White" before he took his final ride on the half pipe at the Winter Olympics last week. I thought the coach made a racist comment against another competitor or even a racy remark about a woman in the stands.

Nope. He said firetruck.

Actually, he said a word that contains some the same letters but fewer syllables than firetruck, but out of respect for the rules that govern this newspaper, I'm obligated to use a stand in.

Keene and White were discussing what tricks White would perform during his final run of the snowboarding competition in Vancouver. White was guaranteed the gold because no other contenders came close to the score of his first performance.

According to an article written by Associated Press writer Rachel Krech, the conversation went like this:

Keene: What do you want to do?

White: I don't know, man. Ride down the middle?

Keene: No, have some fun.

White: Drop a double mick?

Keene: Yeah, drop a double mick at the end. Do whatever you want, and "firetruck" send that thing. Make sure you stomp the "firetruck" out of that thing.

The conversation was caught by NBC cameras during a live broadcast that lacked a delay.

NBC announcers and commentators immediately apologized, claiming White and his coach were caught up in the "high energy" of the moment.

Perhaps they should apologize for not requiring a seven-second delay on every live feed and let people take responsibility for their own conversations.

I tried to find a video of the exchange, but couldn't find anything online. What I did find, however, certainly casts a different light on the coach's words.

I found a video of White practicing a double mctwist 1260, or "double mick," during the 2010 Winter X Games in January. Somehow, White got turned around and when he came down from his trick, he bashed his head off the edge of the halfpipe - a solid block of ice - so hard his helmet flew off. At first glance, it looked like he broke his neck. He slid to the bottom of the pipe, shook his head and, after a couple of minutes, walked off the ice as if nothing happened.

I'm sure it shook him up quite a bit, and since it was only a couple of weeks before the Olympics, perhaps he still had a healthy fear of the stunt.

So maybe his coach was giving him a pep talk during a supposed private conversation. Read Keene's words again in light of what happened at the X Games, and see if you don't perceive it as a coach telling his athlete to get out there and own it.

Let's not forget that Keene and White are adults. It's OK for adults to use curse words in private conversation. Really.

What I don't understand is how certain words became curses. Why is "aspens" bad to say, but butt is not? Who decided "shirt" is worse than poop? None of this makes sense to me, a person whose career revolves around the proper use of English words. I won't chastise a person for using "firetruck," one of the most versatile words in the English language, unless they make a spelling or grammatical error with it. Words are just words; it's the meaning behind them that does real damage.

My great-great-aunt Kathryn was well into her 90s when she passed away last year, and she was a sharp spitfire until the very end. I always enjoyed visiting with her; at her age, she wasn't afraid to speak her mind, and I appreciated that very much. One afternoon, she shuffled to get out of her easy chair and said, "I've gotta pi-- ." I goodnaturedly scolded her and said, "Don't let my mom hear you curse." She looked me straight in the eye and said, "I didn't curse, I said pi--."

She's right, she didn't curse. She didn't put a hex on anyone, or talk bad about a person; she said a word. We need to understand that it's not the words we use, but the intent behind them. How many times in a day does someone gossip about a friend or cutdown a child? That is certainly worse that saying "firetruck" on national television, but most people don't see it that way. They get hungup on details, and miss the conversation for the words.

With that said, it's good to remember that some words are considered disrespectful when used in certain company (which is why the last two letters of Kathryn's statement were removed for this column), and we should do our best to watch our mouths. But let's not get wrapped around the axle over something so silly as a private conversation.

(Nicolov, an assistant editor at The News-Item, writes "Don't Get Me Started" for each Friday edition. Contact her at julie_n@newsitem.com)

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