Husband's hair piece focus of frustration
Dear Abby: My husband wears a hairpiece. Unfortunately, it doesn't look very real. Nearly every time we are in a public place, I notice somebody staring or laughing at it. I have talked to him about it only a couple of times, but each time he tells me how attached he is to it and how good it feels on his head. I want him to be happy, but I do not want him to be publicly ridiculed. Should I throw it away? - Wife Of A Man With A "Secret"
Dear Wife: Absolutely not. If you want to help your husband, start talking with some hairstylists. There may be a product on the market that is more convincing than what your husband is wearing. (Depending upon how much hair he has on the back of his head, a transplant of some follicles may also be possible.) This isn't just about him having something on his head that "feels good." If it was only that, he'd be wearing a hat.
Dear Abby: I am recently married, and my husband and I have not consummated our marriage. I made it very clear that this would not be a part of our life together, and he agreed long before we took our vows. We sleep separately.
Recently, my husband has become sullen and passive-aggressive. He tries to push the issue, to the point of making unwanted physical contact. He knew going in that I am extremely uncomfortable with this form of intimacy and that my views would not change.
We love each other, but his behavior is starting to take a toll on me and the stress is straining our relationship. Please help. - Asexual In Love
Dear Asexual: You and your husband are obviously not on the same page as far as what your expectations are about your marriage. How uncomfortable for you and how frustrating for him. He may have thought that after your wedding, with time, he could change your mind - or he may regard your lack of interest in sex as personal rejection.
For the kind of marriage you envisioned, both parties must feel the same way about sex. Because he agreed to something he can't live with, it might be better for both of you if you separated.
(Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Write Dear Abby at www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.)